Still

My mom was admitted into the hospital last night.

It was a little bit scary to come home yesterday and saw that after putting on a thick jacket and 4 blankets, she still couldn’t stop shaking. She shook like she was in somewhere very cold. Her Temperature was really high, and it looks like she was almost unconscious. We (only me & a sister at home) couldn’t do anything but trying to slow down her heat.

For some of you who’ve been in this situation before, you may be able to guess how it is like to run to the hospital, packing your clothes and etc. Usually I’m not quite a good person to handle pressure, anxiety and exhaustion ^_^ Panic and anxiety did make a great visit on me, and on a Valentine’s night!!?? All my plans are no longer as planned anymore. And totally I’m always a person that freak out and get cranky when things don’t go as planned. After have been with her for more than 5hrs, running home to get clothes, got home, found out I forgot keys, and went back to the hospital, emotion started to take control. I couldn’t help crying to my bf….haha, this is the funny part. Besides the fact that mom is sick, I cried just because my Valentine’s night was about to be over….so I asked him for my flower that he hadn’t had a chance to give yet..just to cheer myself up.

It’s a bit funny after looking back to last night. This morning I woke up with the alarm clock in my mobile phone. Strangely I’ve never noticed that I set this song as the alarm, maybe because every other morning I was just very sleepy and really didn’t pay attention. But this morning, it was so clear just like it was singing to me. It goes..

“When the oceans rise and thunders roar
I will soar with you above the storm
Father you are king over the flood
I will be still and know you are God” (Still by Hillsongs)

This song played over and over. Maybe just because I was sleepy so didn’t turn it off, but it was so clear in my ears, my spirit. I know this is His message.

“Be still, and know that I am God”
..Be still…
..Be still….

Just a bit Funny when God told me to be still when I was so ready to get cranky and freak out anytime. So this morning while driving to work, I got a moment to ponder and be still. Just that moment that I was “still”, planning to ask for God’s Love and mercy over me, I felt at this time, God is especially hugging me, holding me and telling me that He loves me. He knew already what I needed!! Strangely today I heard His voice very clear more than any other days. Yes!! God told me to be still and trust. This is the best reason why I should stop freaking out….^_^ When I looked back, many good things happened out of this situation. A chance to pray for my mom out loud in front of her without embarrassment, a chance to know how much I want her to come to His salvation, a Valentine’s nite that seems to be ruined but instead, it was a night that he showed me “LOVE” more than any other days in action (he was really tough, driving around back and forth, walking afar to get me dinner when all restaurants were already closed, and went home after midnight).

I will be still and know that He’s God.
Are you “still” in front of Him today??